Address: 97-99 Wardour St. London
Price: Burger and fries about £10
Rating: ****
*Exclusive Champagne Charlie Toilet Niceness Rating*: * (there was graffiti on the wall, not sure if it was artistic or not. I didn’t like it though…)
Before talking about it, I should probably confess that this review was corrupt from the start – I wanted to like Byron before I even got there. This is because:
A) My second favourite food hunk of all time, Giles Coren, went there, and he liked it. I like to like the same things as he does because I imagine that if we ever meet, he’ll say something like, “wow, we like all the same things!” and then he might think I am cool and want to be my friend.
B) The longest book I’ve ever read was a massive biography of Byron on holiday, and I am quite proud of it. Seriously, it was enormous, and it had basically no pictures…
C) I was going to see my friend Edd and I was very excited. I had already decided that even if Byron was some kind of grimy cold war style hell hole where the food was flung on our plates with disdain and spittle, I’d still have a super duper time.
So, you see, this can’t be an entirely unbiased review. However, I did genuinely think Byron was great.
For one, the service was freakishly fast. The waitress took our order, walked away, and then basically came straight back but WITH OUR FOOD. Creepy eh? In fact, it was so fast that I was pretty suspicious. I was forced to accept, however, that they had definitely produced our order, because I had asked for my burger blue and it was very blue.
I liked that too. They actually cook things how you want them to be cooked, instead of just asking you and then casually tossing the paper away. So when they asked how I wanted it cooked and they brought it back seconds before rigor mortis set in, I had to admit defeat. Byron 1 – Charlotte 0.
Courgette chips were also tasty and piping hot (how did they do that in the time, how, how?!) and all very reasonably priced – about £15 each for burgers, fries, and a little drinkie. I even grew to love the bizarre projection of twenties synchronised swimmers on the wall, although I still question how and why it’s a suitable video to show at restaurant majoring in fried foods and saturated fat. Ho hum.
Splashing or no splashing, Byron is pretty good. Nice meat, nice place, not too much monies. Only one minor criticism: I’d have preferred firmer buns. The end.
Not actually the end… here is the Byron website in case you want to go: http://www.byronhamburgers.com/
…and if you’re too lazy to look up the locations, they have them in:
Canary Wharf
Covent Garden
Haymarket
Kensington
Northcote Road
Wardour Street (this is the one I went to, the others could be rubbash for all I know..)
Charing Cross
Earl’s Court Road
Hoxton
King’s Road
Old Brompton Road
White City
Cheapside
Gloucester Road
Islington
Kingston
Putney
The actual end.



